bigote nights club

Awit ni Joni*

Ana Morayta

Ano e, pagod si Joni noon, naalala kong sinabi niya

Minsan sa Bigote: Pagod ako Mami

Sabay ubo, malalim at dumadarang –

Nakarinig ako ng gasgas sa lalamunan

Isang kanta lang, isang Brickell o Chapman,

Sabi ng mga taong medyo lasing na

At sentimental sa isang gabi

ng muling pagkikita

at pag-alis ng isang kasama

E ganun naman ata talaga, hindi ba't

magkatuwang ang pagtatagpo at paglisan

Dahil wala namang bigat ang paglisan

kung hindi iyung nais mong makatagpo ang magpapaalam

At ano lang nga ba naman ang muling pagkakatagpo

kung hindi siya ang iyong inaasam?

Dahil kahit tila wala kang magawa,

Sa katunayan e ang pag-ibig ay isang pagpapasiya

Ang pag-ibig ay pagpanig

At pagkitil sa kabilang hindi mo pinili

At pagkikipagtitigan sa mata

O pagpapaputok ng mga buto sa daliri

At marami pang iba,

Pero mabalik nga tayo sa kwento,

Na isang gabi sa Bigote pinapakanta,

Pero pagod na itong ating kasama

Pero - kumanta pa rin - kumanta si Joni

Pinunit ng boses niya ang hatinggabi.

May bahid ng paos

Nagpapaalala ng dausdos ng usok ng yosi

at matagal na paghihintay.

Pagpupuyat paglalakad at paglalakbay

Pabulong at humahagod sa ilang bahagi

Parang nanunuyo at nanunukso

Parang humihimas sa katawang hapo

Malutong at marahas kung bumirit,

Galit at nag-aalimpuyo

Sa sagasa ng pakikipag-iibigan

O sa malupit na panahon

Sa hilalil at panlilinlang

Sa walang katarungan

Sa mga sandaling nasayang

Sa pagpapatuloy

At sa bukas na sinusubukang mabago

Tuluy-tuloy lang.

At maalala ko lang,

Nung gabing umawit si Joni

Nakita n'yo ba kung paanong bago siya tumayo

Ay marahan at mariing hinaplos ni Anton

ang isang eksaktong lugar sa kanyang likod niyang hapo.

________________________________________
*mula sa Kasal sa Apoy at iba pang Nagbabagang Balita

21 september 1972

(REUTERS/Romeo Ranoco)

(AP/Bullit Marquez)

Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night
(dylan thomas)

Do not go gently into that good night.
Old age should burn and rage at the close of day.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

alone again, naturally

The tragedy of this world is that no one is happy, whether stuck in a time of pain or of joy. The tragedy of this world is that everyone is alone. For a life in the past cannot be shared in the present. Each person who gets stuck in time gets stuck alone.*

-from Einstein's Dreams, Alan Lightman

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*salamat kay castro, hindi ka nag-iisa, lahat tayo ay nag-iisa.

and I’m drawn to those ones that ain’t afraid*

A case of you
(joni mitchell)

Just before our love got lost you said,
"I am as constant as a northern star."
And I said, "Constantly in the darkness
Where's that at?
If you want me I'll be in the bar."
On the back of a cartoon coaster
In the blue TV screen light
I drew a map of Canada
Oh Canada
With your face sketched on it twice
Oh, you're in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you, darling
And I would still be on my feet
Oh I would still be on my feet

Oh I am a lonely painter
I live in a box of paints
I'm frightened by the devil
And I'm drawn to those ones that ain't afraid
I remember that time you told me, you said,
"Love is touching souls"
Surely you touched mine
'Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time
Oh, you're in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you, darling
Still, I'd be on my feet
I would still be on my feet

I met a woman
She had a mouth like yours
She knew your life
She knew your devils and your deeds
And she said,
"Go to him, stay with him if you can
But be prepared to bleed"
Oh but you are in my blood
You're my holy wine
You're so bitter, bitter and so sweet
Oh, I could drink a case of you, darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I would still be on my feet

_____________
*sa crossing-ilalim (kina caloy, eleyn at iris, at sa ating mga deferred dreams); as iris puts it: to our nights of tears